Archive for the ‘Surviving after a stroke,’ Category

Since I have come to live in in the convalescent home  I have had to learn many new things.  Since my last stroke in 2005 I have much difficulty getting everything to move around on my body.  At first I couldn’t even speak clearly, but after much speach therapy I got  better.  I still have trouble , but I have gotten used to the different feeling.  To See what this was like  just pretend sometime  that you can’t move around.  All of the things, you used to do  you now can’t do.  The thought is very scary.  Basically that’s what happens when you have a stroke.  One of the things people don’t realize about a stroke is you have to change your thinking.  As you once moved around without giving it a thought  now requires a great deal of thought and attention to move certain parts of your body.

In fact you have to relearn completely new steps inside your mind to move around.  God  has given us a great machine called the brain.  Believe it or not, you can actually re-program  things that have been damaged.  As for myself, I have chosen to do this. This thinking requires a great deal of effort .  Typically we are not programmed to do this.  So, those who are helping you need to be patient and understanding with you.

I heartily recommend this attitude.  This challenge gives your mind something to focus on.  Mentally, you begin to realize that you can be in control again.  Now, granted the control is not what you are used to having but it is the beginning of a great life adventure.

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I know this might be a strange thing to talk about… but here goes.  I like to smoke a couple of cigars a week .  I like the taste and it’s very relaxing.  I have been smoking cigars for about 30 years now.  I had been self-employed when I started.  It was one of the few ways that I could have  time to myself.  No phone, no pager, no interruptions, usually.  It was something I was doing before I had my stroke.  So now it makes me feel more independent.  [normal]

When I first started out   I smoked the cheapest cigars.  I could find.  These items didn’t really taste good, after all I was seeking the taste not to get the high smoking gives you.  So I began looking for a better tasting cigar.  I found one that I liked and stuck to that.  I found the cigar box is handy too.  Real good for storing things , and giving to the grandkids.  These cigars were the inexpensive kind but tasted good, also.

Now,  after my second stroke as I got better I got to thinking… “I’m not getting any younger” so I considered buying a better cigar.  I got on the Internet and found just what I wanted.  Soon, I had a better tasting cigar which I enjoy very much.  [cuban crafters.com]

When a person has a stroke we tend to give up on everything.    I  guess what I’m trying to say here is please don’t give up .  Perhaps, you really enjoyed a good cup of coffee or tea, or maybe a glass of wine, a tasty cold beer, a special candy bar… no matter what… if it won’t kill you perhaps  you can go ahead  .  You are still a person and can make choices.

I  found myself in the hospital and  I remember thinking, well I should be out here soon, as I didn’t like hospitals.  N OT… well, things got worse and I could not move.  This was very frightening to me, since the worst injury I had suffered to date was a broken leg.  Yes going back on writing this is very hard.  I had to recall events that were very hard for me to go through.

The hospital checked me in and took me up to a room.  My whole right side was frozen as I could not move anything.  They had  me on my back, and I couldn’t even  rest.  I am a side sleep person and that was most uncomfortable.  My family came to see me and all felt so strange.  I just wanted to be out of there and was so angry at myself for having this damned   stroke.

My oldest daughter  came in and pushed me in a wheelchair around the facility.  It was good to get out there.  However, I felt useless.  Now remember, I have been self employed for years and have taken care of myself all that time.  Being confined to a wheelchair was awful.  Just the thought of it made me ill.

I was in the hospital for three days and then they decided to move me into a convalescent home.  Once again, I had no control over what was going on.  The place was nice but full full of old people.  I was told that I was going to get therapy there   so I could work on getting better.  Now, I was 67 years old, and  only about 40 in my mind.

Once again, I had to get used to being in the new place with people I didn’t know.  I was  a very private guy and found it very difficult to allow myself to fit in .  The physical therapy people were very kind and put up with my attitude.  My stroke was truly awful… and I needed help getting  in and out of bed, brushing my teeth, going to the bathroom, and just trying to get around in the wheelchair.  I became determined that I was going to lick this problem.